How to fix your mindset?

My colleagues Akshay Chalke and Gaurav Thosani are full pictionaries of movies. While our group has some discussion, they relate to some or the other sequence of a movie, say, the dialog and start laughing amongst themselves. At times, we’re clueless what transpired, other times few other friends also start laughing when present context and movie sequence is clear. Initially, I used to look at Akshay and Gaurav with confusion, what the heck? What’s the meaning, what’s so special in that? At times, when they used to inform about the movie sequence (mostly I’d not watched) I used to feel what’s funny in that? In some chats, when I’d watched the movie, I went back about quarter of a century (I’m very old!). These small incidents helped me learn how can you fix your mindset?

My story

It was 1997, I’d just started traveling, that too alone – a distance of 500km (overnight bus journey) for my engineering. Being the youngest in family, naturally, I had lived in lot of protection and guidance. On top of that I was emotional & quick to get nostalgic. Those days, about 25 years back, video coach buses were cheaper and used to provide entertainment by playing a movie till mid night.

It’s a nuisance if you don’t like the movie and a headache if you want to sleep for next day’s college. On top of all this, my mindset and disappointment with my present situations, made me uncomfortable and disappointed by the world in general. Though, the movies used to be light comedy like- Ishq or Govinda- movies of 90s. Some movies used to be slapstick comedy – no sense, just laughter rides. But, my mental condition, disappointments and nostalgia made me hate these movies. I never liked some hit comedy movies of that time, such as Ishq, Dulhe Raja, Auntie No. 1, Bade Miyan chhote miyan etc. In fact some songs made it to the list for example song of movie Ishq Nind churayi Meri kisne o Sanam; although I always liked singer Udit Narayan over others of that time.

Lessons

I started giving some thoughts on the incidents when Akshay, Gaurav and colleagues laughed on that movies sequences etc. I realized, if one’s mind is disturbed anything around doesn’t feel good. In fact the association with situations and mindset can be as long as decades. The next thought was now when I know it is mind’s problem, how to fix your mindset?

I’ve watched few of those movies in last few years. Now I wonder those were not as bad, in fact, few were hit of that period. Slowly I realized, these are small moments of fun and lightening the mood. At the end of the day, one must be happy that’s the bare minimum one can have in life.

How to fix your mindset?

The point is, how can one be beyond one’s mental state and situations and still be happy / balanced in tough times?

1. one way is to be in the present moment (tough hum?)
2. learn to differentiate between the situation you are facing currently with the general state of your mind that’s created by other situations in life. You must have heard of keep your work and personal life separate (Easier said than done right?)
3. fake happiness (balance or equanimity) as in the movie Three idiots “All iz well”
4. look at learning opportunity in this tough time. Focus on lesson than the pain (easier)
5. meditate daily (the best)

Fixing your mindset become easy if you start any of the above steps. In my opinion is a better method of fixing mindset. Otherwise we become headless chicken driven by the situations around us. Still, if you’re unable to make your mind, reach out to me, we can speak on this lesson. Lastly read this simple telephonic discussion that could give you an idea or this may give some drift.