Adviti – my daughter – is close to 1.5 years now. I have been witnessing her growth as any parent would. Earlier, she used to cry mostly when she was hungry then slowly the “needs” increased and “reasons” for crying too. When something she wants does not happen, she expresses it her own way. Slowly she has learnt another method of expressing herself – either making a sharp sound or fists to show her anger. In all these months, I see there is a kind of growth. The growth I am talking about starts sticking with us. It is about our ego, getting the things done our way.
I was discussing a situation with a friend of mine. He is too talkative – yes more than me. During our call based on the situations and narratives, I was finding loopholes in his arguments and interrupting him. I told him that the situation in your case proves that you are egoist, reasons a, b and c. He gave alternative reasoning to my pointers to which I gave more alternative reasoning. The call concluded, it was futile to explain to him from an outsider’s perspective.
My days with Adviti are turning more interactive, expressive and entertaining. I see, the recent phone call and Adviti’s activities in a lens that makes me feel that we grow in certain way and ego starts blending in our lifestyle sooner than probably we expect.
Adviti is able to differentiate between herself and others. She is slowly understanding that we appreciate few things and do not few others. If she has to getaway with unacceptable actions she has started knowing her away out. My friend was trying the same – finding a way out with alternative arguments.
I doubt if I should call it ego in case of Adviti she is barely 16+ months. Yet, when I see her at times looking for recognition, at times faking sobbing and showing bit of anger it shows she is growing, she is recognizing her liking and possibly her way of getting things done.
When we start growing and our ego is in between it limits our possibilities of blossoming, be it personal life or professional. My friend is stuck, he still needs to learn it is his ego that is causing him the pain.